So how do we approach planning and design with our clients? It starts with a vision meeting aka dreaming beyond the limits!!! During this time, I want to hear everything my clients envision for their… More
So What Do I Say? Tips on Writing Your Wedding Vows
When writing vows, couples should not be afraid to let their true selves shine through. After all, vows are a declaration of your love for each other before the public. This is your opportunity to create a heartfelt and authentic declaration of love. I encourage couples to take the time to reflect on their relationship, the moments that shaped them, and the promises you want to make to each other. So when writing your vows what are some things that you can use to get you started?
- Infuse your vows with personal anecdotes, inside jokes, or dreams you share. What are those things that you have shared with one another that can make the moment just that much more special and uniquely yours?
- Incorporate elements of your journey together, it can be the ups and downs, the laughter and tears, the adventures and quiet moments. Let your love story unfold through your words, allowing your guests to feel the depth of your connection. After all these moments together often make a couple stronger and solidify their bond even more.
- Be honest, sincere, and genuine. Speak from the heart and let your love radiate through each word you choose. Embrace vulnerability and express your hopes, dreams, and commitment to one another. Remember, your vows are an expression of your promises for a lifetime.
- Ensure your vows complement each other. Discuss the overall tone, length, and themes to ensure a harmonious balance during the ceremony.
Ultimately, crafting your vows should be an enjoyable process that reflects the essence of your relationship. So, take your time, let your creativity flow, and create vows that will leave a lasting impression on both you and your loved ones.
Need help with crafting your vows? Of just navigating through your wedding planning process. We would love to connect with you.
Top 3 Reasons to Develop a Wedding Day Budget
One of the first things I encourage my couples to do is to set their wedding day budget. I know, I know, who likes to talk about money right? But I think there are some key benefits in setting your budget before the planning starts.
“So what exactly is a wedding day budget?” I like to think of your wedding day budget in several layers.
It is what a couple estimates they will spend on their overall wedding day and then they will break that overall amount into how much they will spend on each wedding day item they’ve identified within their budget.
I know talking about money can be uncomfortable and just hearing the word budget can freak you out. I know first-hand, whenever I hear the word budget I kind of freak out a bit myself and I’m an accountant. The word budget can seem restrictive. But budgets are not meant to be restrictive they are meant to be a valuable tool that can help you see where and how your money is being spent.
I reflect back on what an example that I used to give my accounting students when I would tell them, everyone has a budget…one day I was doing some window shopping and saw a statute in the window that had a price tag of over $1M dollars. So even if I had $500,000 in the bank which is a lot of money, I still would be limited in buying the statute. That doesn’t mean I cannot afford certain luxuries, it just means that my budget would have a lower amount for special décor items and I would just find a really nice statute that fell within my budgeted amount.
So what are the top 3 reasons a couple should develop a wedding day budget?
- It first gives you a reference point on how to allocate your overall budget that you can use when trying to secure vendors for specific wedding line items, such as florals, DJ, photo.
- It allows you to shift monies around to other categories that you may deem important. I like to start with a general wedding day budget that allocates your overall amount to your specific line items. Once that is done, I review with my clients to see what is most important for them. For instance, one line item I have in the budget is transportation, however, if you have your ceremony/reception at a hotel then this may not be an item that is necessary and this money can be moved to another category.
- It can also help you control your costs. A budget allows you to put your estimated amount next to your actual amount and you can see if you are staying within the parameters that you have set. If you are under budget, maybe you can move that money to another area where you may be over budget on.
There are so many additional benefits that you receive when you create your budget early and I really encourage all couples to do so. Because at the end of the day, wedding costs can add up and I never want a couple to be caught by surprise on what they are spending.
Got questions about wedding day budgets? We would love to hear from you. Click here to be connected with our team.
What Do I Serve at My Social Event?
When planning your social event there are going to be many major decisions made to create your perfect event. Aside from determining your theme and choosing the perfect venue, food is going to be a very important aspect,. I don’t know about you but I deem choosing the menu for your soiree can be the most important decision you have to make. I think Chef Yotam Ottolenghi said it best “Food can bring people together in a way nothing else can.”
So what makes for good food for your social event? When looking at food choices, it is essential to consider a variety of options that will cater to different tastes and even dietary preferences of your guests. Considering dietary preferences has become really important over the years with the increasing amount of allergies being recognized. In addition, I like to incorporate the event theme for my clients into the food choices. Typically the appetizers or desserts would be the best time to showcase your theme.
Let’s take a look at some of our faves to serve:
APPETIZERS AND FINGER FOODS
- Mini Sliders or Bite-Sized Sandwiches (And these don’t have to be just the traditional beef, get adventurous by having mini chicken sliders in between waffles, or even impossible sliders for your Vegan guests)
- Mini Quiches or Tartlets
- Bruschetta
- Ceviche
- Charcuterie Board
MAIN COURSE
- Pasta, Carving, and Seafood Stations
- Comfort Food Stations (Mac and Cheese, French Fries, Wingettes)
- Build-your-own Taco/Nacho Bar
- Vegetarian or Vegan Options like Stuffed Peppers, Vegetable Stir Fry, or Portobello Mushroom
- Plated options such as Salmon or Black Pepper Encrusted Prime Rib
SIDE DISHES
- Roasted Vegetables such as Carrots, Brussels Sprouts, or Asparagus
- Greek or Caesar Salad
- Wild Rice Pilaf
- Grilled Corn
- Garlic and Herb Mashed Potatoes
DESSERTS
- Mini Cupcakes, Pies, or Cake Pops
- Assorted Cookies and Brownies
- Ice-Cream Sunday Bar
- Fruit Tarts
- Beignets with Fresh Fruit
DRINKS
- Non-alcoholic options like Fruit-Infused Water, Lemonade, or Iced Tea
- Sparkling Water and Juices
- Signature Cocktails or Mocktails
- Coffee, Tea, and Hot Chocolate Stations
- Boba Tea Bar
Overall I tell my clients that their event should be an overall experience. So you can ask yourself how you want your clients to experience food at your next event? Also, remember to consider dietary restrictions and allergies when planning the menu, and offer vegetarian, vegan, and gluten-free options to accommodate various dietary preferences.
We love planning. If you have questions, we would love to hear from you. Let’s connect!
#SquadGoals
Let’s talk about squad goals! As a planner my ultimate goal is to ensure that my bride and grooms are able to live in the moment on their wedding day! There are so many dynamics to consider when you plan a wedding. One of the major dynamics is who will be a part of your team or squad.
Being a part of a squad is not just about having a title, it comes with responsibility.
Squad /skwäd/ is defined by the Oxford English Dictionary as a small group of people having a particular task…which means that we all have a common goal. That common goal is to ensure the happiness of the bride by creating and setting a stress-free environment. Great squads show up for the bride on her wedding day. But I have also found that the best squads are those who are there for you in and out of season, meaning not just on your wedding day, but the bond starts way before you say “I Do.”
I LOVE when a squad understands that the assignment on their friend’s wedding day is to be on one accord and be pro #teambride.
So what makes a good squad? I have identified 5 things that I have seen over the years that have made for a good squad.
- A good squad is as happy as or even happier for the bride than she is for herself. They are there to share in her special moments and be excited that she is marrying the love of her life.
- A good squad understands who their friend is, and recognizes that this may be one of the most exciting, yet stressful times of her life. They are there to comfort her, lend a listening ear, or even pray with her.
- A good squad wants to make sure that the bride is at her best and is at peace on her wedding day. Often times the bride will have a sleepover the night before the wedding. This is where the squad can make sure she gets a good night’s sleep. You can also plan for her to have breakfast in the morning. Lastly, work with the planner to ensure that you are doing the things that the bride truly wants for her wedding day, and not what you think she wants.
- A good squad has team players who are all willing to chip in to complete the needed tasks for the day regardless of role or title. It’s about getting stuff done!
- A good squad also cares for the other team members. If there are differences, they realize those differences are not bigger than the common goal and that is to support the bride! I have actually seen friendships mended because team members knew it wasn’t about them and if the bride saw something in each of them, that was worth the effort.
Over the years, I have seen some really great squads. I think the key to having this for your wedding day starts with the selection process.
Just like the NBA and NFL drafts, you should be very selective on who you give this honor to as it can make all the difference in the world!
Got questions? We would love to hear from you. Let’s connect!
Should I Get My Partner a Wedding Day Gift?
My clients often ask me should they exchange gifts and my answer is “that is totally up to you, but I do think it is a great gesture.” You see wedding day gifts can be something as simple as your partner’s favorite candy bar. It doesn’t have to be this extravagant gift, although there is nothing wrong with that if that’s what you choose to do, but as the old saying by writer and poet Van Dyke says “It’s not the gift, but the thought that counts.”
What Is a Gift Exchange?
In a nutshell, it’s a way that you and your partner can honor and celebrate one another right before you walk down the aisle. I love to see couples who do this, I feel it helps reassure them that this is definitely the person they should be spending the rest of their lives with. I also think it helps them feel connected on their wedding day, especially since most couples elect not to see or talk to each other before they walk down the aisle.
The gift exchange is typically done some time before the wedding but the beauty of it is that there are no set rules! Most of my couples will choose to use the time that they are getting ready to open gifts. I’ve seen the exchange happen:
- The night before at the wedding rehearsal and the couple will open on wedding day
- Special delivery of the package from either the planner, the venue host, or someone in the bridal party, or
- The gift is in the get ready room before the couple arrives
So I hear you asking me, what are all the details surrounding a gift exchange, after all, it’s all about the details right? Below are answers to some of the questions you may have:
What should I get my partner? I tell my clients first to think about what your partner likes or what will make them light up when seeing this gift. This shouldn’t be about what someone else thinks is an appropriate gift for your partner, it’s about what you think is important.
- One client got his bride-to-be a pair of shades from her favorite designer Quay My oh my did my client’s eyes brighten up.
- Another client got his bride-to-be a luggage tag from her favorite designer, you see they were going to begin their new life moving to a new state and would be taking a road trip to get there. He wanted to mark the start of their new life together.
- One groom sent sandwiches and the bride’s favorite champagne to the room because he knew she wouldn’t take the time to eat and he wanted to make sure she had something, can you say awe how sweet is that?
- And no it’s not just about the bride….one client got her partner a watch to add to his collection because he loved timepieces.
How much should the gift cost? There is no set limit on how much you should spend on a gift. I think this is a decision you and your partner should make. Do what is comfortable for you.
What else should I know?
- I often suggest that my couples write a special note to each other, it can be short and sweet. Something just to let each other know that you’re in this together!
- Schedule time to open your gift so that your photographer and cinematographer can document the moment. After all, you won’t get to see each other’s reaction on your wedding day. I think it is a nice picture for the couples to review when looking through their wedding photos.
So is a gift exchange right for you? That is a question that only you can answer my friend! But I say, who doesn’t like getting a little extra something, something.
Photo Credit: San Diego Stars Photography – Cinematography
How Sweet It Is!
Or should we ask the question, how sweet is it? I’m often asked by couples if they should keep their wedding cake? So why do couple’s even ask the question? History shows that in the 19th century the tradition was for the couple to save the top-tier for the christening of their first child. Well over the years times have changed. Many couples wait to have children or some have even opted out of having children at all. So the question becomes what works best for you?
Are you more of a symbolic couple who likes to follow traditions? Or is it about creating the moment or memory?
About Creating Traditions
- Save the top tier of your wedding cake
- Securely wrap the top tier in Saran Wrap
- Next put in an airtight container (I recommend putting this on your wedding checklist to bring on your wedding day so the caterer can put it directly in the container)
- Place in freezer as soon as you can, of course after your wedding night.
Also
- Consult with your baker, maybe they have some suggestions on preserving your cake
- Remember that your cake possibly won’t taste the same a year later
About Creating the Moment and Memory
- Eat your top tier on your wedding day
- Go back to your baker on your first year anniversary and get a fresh, savory cake that you guys will really enjoy
- And don’t forget the glass of champagne
Again, I really try to emphasize to my clients that it is my job to guide them through etiquette and traditions during the planning process, ultimately it is your wedding day and you make the rules.
And if you’re still on the fence about your decision, I can tell you this, if you make the decision not to save the cake, you will survive
. I’m a living witness. My husband and I didn’t get any cake at our wedding, and we were dying to have a piece of German chocolate cake layered in chocolate icing and we knew we couldn’t wait until our 1st year anniversary, so we looked at each other and dived in on our wedding night.
Planning by: Erika’s Elegance Weddings & Events
Photo by: Kelly Waterman Photography
Cake by: Plumeria Cake Studio
Florals by: Hydrangea Bleu
Linens by: Wildflower Linen
Venue: The Pacific Club
How Many Bridesmaids Did You Say?
I am often asked by brides how many bridesmaids are too many? Per The Knot, tradition dictates the number of bridesmaids you have. Weddings with 200 or more guests a bride can have up to 12 girls, and for less formal weddings between 1-6.
I always ask my bride, who are you in relationship with? Who are your closest friends and confidants? Those are the people you want to partner with you on your special day.
I often find when brides start making their bridesmaid’s list, they start from the moment they initially started dreaming about getting married. This could have been in high school, or even during your college days. So they’ll add the high school BFF on the list, or the college roommate. This leads to a list of 20+ bridesmaids. Now I’m not saying there is anything wrong with having 20+ bridesmaids, but what I am saying is to do an assessment and see if you really have a true relationship with those people. Is it necessary for them to be a part of your special day as a member of the bridal party or can they play another role? The last thing you want to do is spend your day managing your girls and not get a chance to truly enjoy and bond with them before you walk down the aisle.
I have seen weddings with one bridesmaid to as many as 25 and both were beautiful. It is your wedding and you can definitely have as many bridesmaids as you want but ensure your bridal squad reflects those who you want nearest to you on your special day.
Ultimately I say surround yourself with positive and loving people who will be #teambride on your wedding day!
Got questions? I would love to hear your questions and provide my feedback. Please drop us a note in the comments or you can email us today!
I Said Yes but What Next?
As a wedding planner I get excited during engagement season every year. So yep I’m pretty much ecstatic from Thanksgiving to Valentine’s Day. Wedding experts at weddingwire.com say that about 40% of engagements happen during this time.
I can see why many couples get engaged during this time. There are so many festivities during those months and what better way to share such an important moment than with family and friends. I’m getting all warm and fuzzy just thinking about it. I would say as a bride it would be one of the best darn Christmas gifts ever or a great way to ring in the new year.
The first thing I hear most brides say is that they have no idea how to start planning their wedding. I tell all of my brides that you must determine your budget first, that’s not only the wedding planner in me talking but I also feel my inner accountant coming out.
Why Start with the Budget First?
Of course you can start with looking for your dress and venue, and even booking your favorite photographer. Those items are very important too. But what if you purchase your dream dress first and it costs $5,000. Later you and your fiancé decide your budget will be $45,000. You’ve already spent about 10% of your budget which doesn’t include alternations. In my budget analysis I typically allot roughly 6-8% on my bride’s dress. By creating your budget first, it should drive all of the other decisions you make in picking your vendors and items for your wedding. Your planner can use this information to help you find vendors that fit your style and price point.
How Do I Create My Budget?
Gone are the days when the bride’s family pays for the wedding. Often it is both set of parents, along, with the bride and groom themselves. I would start by:
- First determining how much you and the groom are able to save from now until you get married. But remember that most items will need to be paid 1-2 months prior to your wedding date, so you will need to consider this when deciding how much you will save.
- Next determine who else will contribute to the wedding including your parents, and even sweet Aunt Susie.
- Lastly, determine how much each will contribute.
- This should be your budget amount. Note I would not consider income taxes amount or bonuses at their full amount in case you don’t get what was anticipated.
Where Should I Spend My Budget Money?
Below is a breakout that I provide my clients. It is rough estimate and can be adjusted based upon your needs.
| Category | Percent Breakdown |
| Bridal Attire & Beauty: | 11% |
| Ceremony: | 2% |
| Reception: | 46% |
| Flowers & Décor: | 9% |
| Entertainment: | 9% |
| Photo & Video: | 12% |
| Invitations & Stationery: | 4% |
| Favors & Gifts: | 4% |
| Accommodations & Transportation: | 3% |
There are so many details when planning your wedding which sometimes may seem a bit overwhelming. This is were a wedding planner can help you get started and navigate you through all of those details. It is very important to have the right planning tools and team in place to make the process seamless and enjoyable for you.
Our team would love to assist with your wedding planning process. Let us know how we can help you by contacting us today!
An Avenue of the Arts Succulent Wedding
Mandy and Justin married on a beautiful fall day in the picturesque city of Costa Mesa. The day was filled with lots of love and laughter between the couple, their families, and friends. There were so many special touches added to the day that represented the couple and the merging of the two families and cultures. The bride chose her favorite color as the dominant color within her color palette which was plum, sage green, and gold. The color palette also paired very well with the design of the venue. As guests arrived they were met with smooth tunes from DJ Katar of Invisible Touch Events as they anxiously awaited the arrival of the bride and groom. This was such a great and memorable day!
And that’s all she wrote, now off to their Happily Ever After
- Planner | Erika’s Elegance Weddings & Event
- Photographer/Videographer/Photo Booth | Alexander Mo
- Venue | Avenue of the Arts Costa Mesa
- Hair and Make-up | Hair & Makeup by Sydney
- Florist | The Pink Daffodil
- DJ/Lighting | Invisible Touch Events
- Cake | Susie Cakes
- Entertainment | Ane Thanh Lion Dance
- Officiant | OC Wedding Minister & Officiant
NYE Party Inspired Photoshoot
So what makes a great party? It’s all about the atmosphere and setting the mood for your guests. Take a look at our moody New Year’s Eve inspired party design. I worked with some amazing vendors to pull together this intimate design where Pantone’s Color of the Year Ultra Violet served as my inspiration.
Why not start with appetizers as your guests arrive?
Your guest will be wowed with the yummy bacon wrapped appetizers which can be paired with champagne as they enter the party. Once apps are done it’s time to have a seat at the main tables. I wanted to create an intimate feeling with the design. So I decided to put the main centerpiece in the middle of the tables so all the guests could a great view.
Who wouldn’t want to gaze at this beauty all night. I loved how Jay of La Petite Florist brought my vision to life. I’m all about the details, and these amazing bling candles Jay created definitely set the mood for our dinner party.
Are you a details person like me? Well if it’s details you want it’s details you’ll get. Look at all the prettiness created. Low centerpieces for our guest tables.
Black and Gold Dinnerware…so regal
Black Wine Glasses for your guests
Black Louis Chairs, I want a few of these at my dinner table.
Gray velvet linens, it’s about getting the right amount of puddle for your tablecloths.
Welcoming your guests for the last day of 2017
And I always like to have a little activity for my guests as we bring in the New Year. Each guest has a 2017 and as we count down, we toss the 2017 out and replace it with 2018.
Now that’s what I call a party. I still cannot believe it is 2018. I literally just went to sleep last night and woke up to a new year. How did that happen? I’m so excited to be embarking on a new year and am looking forward to everything 2018 has to offer. Happy New Year to you all!
Planning/Design: Erika’s Elegance Weddings & Events | Photography: BYC Photography | Venue: Avenue of the Arts Hotel | Rentals/Linens: MTB Event Rentals | Florist: La Petite Florist
A Southern California Wedding & Event Planner 